Author Archives: SK Rajeshwari

In the realm of sedatives

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Where all efforts cease

and the desperate fights are put to rest.

The menacing chaos meets peace

and grants a halt to its aggressive quest.

 

You no longer have to pretend it doesn’t hurt,

coz you know the pain will be back in waves.

But tonight you’ll sleep like a fallen leaf under the dirt.

Unseen. Undisturbed. Still, as in the graves.

 

So what if life is slipping away?

Your desperate hold on life is strangling it anyway.

So relax for now and let the surgeons play,

You’ll get to fight your own fight every other day.

 

You’ll hear faint voices from time to time,

calling out your name from miles afar.

Like a loud church bell sometimes or sweet mumbles of chime,

making it sound sinister and bizarre.

 

Where darling you don’t complain of the ultimate distress.

Despite the oxygen feeder choking your throat.

So what if poking needles and entangled saline pipes are in a mess,

you got a handful of nights to stay peacefully afloat.

 

Where you know it’s a story of your perseverance

and not of punctured nerves and neat stitches.

For you will see all but scars in reminiscence

and the resilience against life’s ugly glitches.

 

So when the fight gets tough, come over my friend

into the renowned realm of sedatives.

A no-man’s land in world’s end

unflatteringly sung about in poesies.

 

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An apology

girl writes a letter

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I speak of the unintended separation.

The void consuming every little trace of happiness left.

Grieving the hollow self,

Of elation, mirth and hope bereft.

 

Surrounded by intelligent machines,

I somehow forgot the human within.

Denied myself the joie-de-vivere

and myriad of emotions you taught me to gloat in.

 

Staring into blank sheets all night,

drowning in nostalgia and dreadful emptiness.

I would feel like bleeding out on the paper

and pour all I felt, enveloped in the harrowing darkness.

 

No doubt the sheets remained empty

reminding me it was half a year back I casually brushed off

the fact that I was fine with getting the sensuality we shared

from my pristine heart being forever stripped off.

 

I would trade my soul for the good old days,

when we would so effortlessly ignore the world.

Spending hours in the lap of nature, entangled with each other,

watching closely as the magic unfurled.

 

It was a delusion that I could survive

sans the guiltless pleasures you brought.

None to be blamed but my ignorant self,

for even conceding the idiotic thought.

 

Now I know you are a fragile little thing,

that demands fierce love, madness and obsession.

I promise to feed you even if I’m starving.

and even when I’m sick, I would nurse you with caution.

 

I’ve watched my heart shatter into countless pieces

and now that I’ve picked each one of them

I place them in your caring hands

hoping you would rescue it from the mayhem.

 

Dying countless deaths in a single day,

trying to fit in with humans, which will forever remain a fallacy

I officially declare that I can’t live without you,

Oh beloved, Poetry!

Tale of a Happy Woman

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Picture Courtesy-Feministaa.com

With twinkling eyes like those of a mischievious child,

the toothless lady endlessly smiled.

Behind those thick rimmed glasses were the doors

that ended straight down at her soul.

 

Lying on her death bed she felt beautiful even then and there,

running those skinny fingers playfully through her wavy white hair.

While gazing at the outstretched sky she went on humming her favorite song

as if staring into death’s eyes and asking him to sing along.

 

When asked by her curious granddaugher the secret to her happiness,

she said its just a choice she made in her yonger days.

To be surrounded by the happiest people on earth,

and to be forever gleaming with positivity and mirth.

 

A few other secrets are reaching out far and wide for all your dreams,

and never give up eating your favorite ice-creams.

Feed your soul with good books and poetry every single day,

also warm hugs from your loved ones work wonders they say.

 

(P.S: I imagined myself in my oldage and wrote this poem and I strongly hope this is the kind of woman I become someday. On this special day I wish that all the ladies out there start practicing self-love and take care of their mental and physical health as seriously as they care for others. To all the strong and beautiful women who inspire me to be a better person each day, wishing you all a Happy Internaional Women’s Day 🙂 )

 

Only Love Is Real- Book Review

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Written by the renown psychiatrist and past life therapist Dr Brian Weiss, ‘Only Love Is Real( The Story of Soulmates Reunited )’ is a unique book based on the real life case studies of his clients undergoing regression therapy. Having read enough of fictional love stories, and having observed enough of dysfunctional relationships among my friends and relatives, I would be understating my impression of this book if I didn’t mention that I was completely blown away by it. For those who have stopped believing in love merely because the people around you make you feel that its all plastic these days, buckle up your seat-belts for you are about to go on a ride that can potentially change your life. It will clear your head and give you a definition of love that isn’t usually shown in movies, or written in those typical pink cover love story paperbacks. If you don’t want to be among those who jump into relationships, only to be hurt and bruised by its end, do some research and step into clear waters. Remember how you rummage through dozens of online stores and apps before buying a product? Comparing the user ratings, going through the potential pros and cons, investing too much time in understanding them before placing the order and agreeing to get them into your house and life. Then why are we not researching about the one important thing in life that impacts us so intensely? Love isn’t a non-existent or unreal concept. In fact only love is real. Get your hands on this book and you will know what I’m talking about. And in case you trust my personal take on it, read on and I’ll brief you.

Dr Weiss subjects some of his clients to regression therapy and the results are astonishing. While being in a hypnotic state they are brought back to their past lifetimes and are questioned about their experiences. However surreal it may sound, it has been well researched and proved over time. Reincarnation is real. We are all caught in the cycle of life, and we keep coming back in different life forms until we have learned the lessons meant for us. Quoting Carl Jung below :

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However cliche it may sound, ‘soulmates’ exist. Needless to say that the modern world is well on the verge of forgetting all about the concept of soulmates, I’m so glad that people like Dr Weiss also exist, who have dedicated their lives to help us understand and hold on to our roots. Our soulmates have traveled with us through lifetimes that we no longer consciously remember. But they have been there with us for so long in the past, that we carry a part of them with us in every lifetime. Our soul recognizes them. They recognize our soul. And this beautiful connection exists, even though we meet that person in our lifetime or not. They may be your partner, mother, father, brother, sister, teacher, friend or someone you are not even related to in any way. The only thing you would be sure of is that there would be a special connection between you and your soulmate. And when you see the one, you will know. And you will trust your instincts. Well, I would love to hear from you people about your take on this. Do you believe in soulmates?

This story is about two clients of Dr Weiss, Elizabeth and Pedro whose shared lifetimes and experiences unfold separately at his clinic. And this, which comes forth as nothing short of a miracle, actually takes the favorable course on its own. Initially strangers, Elizabeth and Pedro recognize a special connection between them even before being informed by the doctor. They are happily married now and are eternally thankful to Dr. Weiss.

To be frank, I thought it would be easy for me to communicate all about this book and all that I feel. But it’s really disheartening to say that I’m failing. And failing miserably at it. Perhaps I don’t want to corrupt the readers of the profound experience I had while reading this fascinating story of love.

The best thing I found in this book is that it is based on real people. I see most fictional characters as real, and I believe their stories too. But when it comes to real people talking about their personal experiences, I won’t shy away from admitting that their joys make me smile somewhat more, their grief makes me cry harder and somehow theirs touch me deeper than the emotions of fictional characters. I trust their experiences and lessons, for they are as human as me. We may be strangers but we all have the capability to uplift each others lives in unimaginable ways. Everyone of us learns something from each of our experiences. A book, movie, heartbreak, an act of kindness, abuse, failure, success, birth or death of a special person; there are countless lessons that come to us each day. We all are surrounded by profound stories like this. What matters is whether or not our eyes and ears are open. What matters is whether we are willing to watch, listen and understand. Take charge, read more about love and emotions, sort your thoughts and lead a more fulfilling life. Because with wisdom comes clarity and a great deal of confidence.  Life is too short to let go of the reigns. So, hold tight and enjoy the fierce ride while the wind pats you on the back.

Happy reading 🙂

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As a Man Thinketh – Book review

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picture credits- Amazon.in

We encounter countless situations in life that compel us to go back to the basics and re-remind ourselves of the strategies we once devised before stepping into the outer world. And since self-help books come as saviors for many of us when life tries to weigh us down, I decided to review some of my favorites. And this one by James Allen, being one of my firsts in self-help, has always remained close to my heart.

Being a book of meager volume, it can be easily carried and read as many times as one feels like. Read it over and over, until the words get absorbed by your heart and mind in a way that it keeps popping up whenever you feel negativity trespassing your aura.

What I absolutely loved in this book is the concept of comparing our mind with a garden. As James Allen speaks, “Man’s mind may be likened to a garden, which may be intelligently cultivated or allowed to run wild; but whether cultivated or neglected, it must, and will, bring forth. If no useful seeds are put into it, then an abundance of useless weed-seeds will fall therein, and will produce their kind.” If you cultivate positive thoughts, it will have a positive impact on your mind and body. And if you allow negative thoughts to linger, they will make both your mind and body sick. So, it all comes down to your choice of thoughts. Either allow happy and positive thoughts to take over your life or be dragged around by negative thoughts like a beast with no self-control.

It would hardly take an hour or so, but would have a profound impact on your life. So, grab a hot cup of coffee, read it, grasp its essence and write me back about your personal impression. I’m pretty sure you can squeeze out one quality hour from your busy schedule and invest it on feeding your soul. Also, I’ll be more than happy if you recommend some of your favorites among your personal self-help collection. Let’s help each other lead happier lives with healthier souls. Looking forward to hearing from you. 🙂

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A touch of nature

As she watched nature weaving it’s own wordless poetry,

her heart fluttered with ecstasy and soul beamed.

And while the playful breeze tingled her senses

she wrote as she walked on the exotic beach.

She felt like the ocean, her roars creating music.

Fathomless and serene.

One who knows she will have her share of storms,

and yet nurses calmness on the surface and within.

She ran along the woods

soaking in glitters of sunshine filtered through the trees.

And smiling wickedly at the surrounding wilderness,

she crowned herself ‘the queen’ with a tiara made of blossoms and leaves.

She knew she was magic incarnate.

Fiercely independent, passionate and free.

An embodiment of elation and peace.

Like the unshackled bird,  singing as she flies in glee.

Cruel Books

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Daughter of Smoke and Bone-Book Review

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“Once upon a time, an angel and a devil fell in love. It did not end well.” – Laini Taylor

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The synopsis was all I had, to judge the book with. I was unaware of the crazy hype it has received over the years. Owing to that, I could have easily passed it over assuming it another cliche love story. But, I’m glad I gave it a chance. Or else I would have missed the opportunity of stepping into this fantastic magical world created by Laini Taylor.

I’m still gloating over the drunken bliss and and don’t you judge me for spilling too much beans for you to digest. I’m probably going to rant all I want, until I somewhat hush my inner demons now going gaga over the awesomeness of the story and its characters. Want to save the fun? Skip the review, and grab the book at Amazon.

Daughter of smoke and bone is a young fantasy novel and is the first book of the trilogy. Following it are ‘Days of Blood and Starlight’ and ‘Dreams of Gods and Monsters’.

If you are the kind of reader who craves for magic, monsters, fantasy, action and are fine with little drizzles of romance, it is just the book for you. It rarely happens that we dive so deep into a book that we forget our own existence and walk down that fictional land under the skin of our favorite character. Good news is it is the kind that will make you live the story in a dangerously realistic way. For me it was like slipping into their world and running with the characters as if I had known them for ages. I was drowning in emotions. Fear, pain, remorse, hatred, love, vengeance, power, bliss. A brilliantly choreographed chaos of events. I experienced a whole different world in it. And of course a good taste of life and death.

Before I brief you with the characters and the plot, I am taking an attempt at describing Taylor’s breathtakingly beautiful writing style. There were moments I gasped, put the book down, closed my eyes and said the words out loud. Simple, short and crisp dialogues exchanged between the two lovers. But good lord what intensity. She as a writer has succeeded in doing justice to her wildly brilliant imagination by giving them a body so poetic and perfect. This book is nothing but a work of art.

I have a strangely strong fascination for monsters. And that is one reason why this book swept me off my feet. I’m sure every other reader would love these characters as much as I did. And in case you are that fussy reader who calls magic ‘abnormal’ and monsters ‘gross’ you may go back to your sunshine books. Forget about The Chronicles of Narnia and the Harry Potter series; this is one of its kind.

The first few chapters hit me hard and I instantly knew it was an original and uniquely bewitching story. And as they say first impression lasts long, that’s precisely what happened here I guess. The first impression that it gave me was so damn appealing and strong that there was no slowing down or turning back. It took me on a roller coaster ride, which needless to say was mind boggling. Fast, reckless, magical, unpredictable, and oh so brilliant in all aspects.

There are numerous instances that prove that Taylor has let her imagination run far and high, tapping into ideas that are absolutely top-notch. Imagination has gotten into numerous minute details of this story. And being wrapped up with the right choice of words they have come out with flying colors. It’s a compelling work of adult fantasy that would grip your heart and mind in a tight clasp and take you on a ride to remember.

Beware of spoilers.

It is a mysterious story that revolves around a 17 year old girl Karou . At first she appears like a normal teen, who studies art at Prague, has a close friend Zuzana and a stalking ex-boyfriend Kazimir. But later, as the story progresses and her secret errands come to light we get to know that she is different, being raised by four Chimaeras. Her art is mostly inspired by the monster-like creatures she has known for real. Now for the question who are Chimaeras, they are a community we are not familiar with. Having some of their physical characteristics like animals and birds, and some like humans, they are residents of a completely different world, which even if not ours feels just as real.

The head of her so called Chimaera family, Brimstone is a fatherly figure for Karou and is the earliest memory of her childhood. He is a sorcerer of sorts and occasionally sends her on teeth-collecting errands to far off places round the world through magic portals. And what do they do with those jars of teeth? That’s for you to unfold. On one such errand fate takes a turn and things go terribly wrong. But right after that, Karou’s curiosity gets the better of her and she steps into the forbidden land of the Chimaeras. She is taken aback by the things she discovers and feels betrayed by Brimstone for keeping her in the dark. But much to her dismay, she does not get an explanation. The portals are burnt by Angels to hinder the work of the devils or Chimaeras. And in the age old war between the devils and angels, naive Karou becomes the victim and gets stranded in the world of humans.

The story gets another high with the entry of the sinfully gorgeous and impossibly perfect Angel Akiva into Karou’s life. Then on, the flight of fantasy gets quite serious and all humor is left at bay. Behind his longing and mutual attraction for Karou lies a story untold. A story so painfully beautiful, you’ll probably curse me if I lay it bare with my emotionless summary. Its a story of love and war. Will the age old war between the Seraphims and the Chimaeras destroy the love of Karou and Akiva? Or will they be able to keep their love unscathed?

I’m off to grab the second one in the series. Read the book and enjoy the magical journey. Thank me later nerds 😉

Paramour

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His existence,

a shimmering mirage.

An embodiment of reverie and deceit.

His name,

a sweet lullaby that makes me dreamy.

A holy chant that awakens my inner beasts.

His piercing blue eyes,

haven for raging storms of venom.

 A fathomless ocean threatening to drown me whole.

His mind,

a dangerous territory.

The devil has trapped me there for eternity.

His mouth,

skilled and addictive.

A magic spell that is too strong to break.

His chiseled body,

like a lifetime’s work of a passionate sculptor.

Reincarnation of the Greek Gods.

His calm mannerism,

like a sea that has battled the worst of storms.

The mystifying silence that puts words to shame.

His touch,

a sensation that burns into the skin.

The kind that leaves a sweet ache lingering.

He is the book I read and re-read,

and happily stay pressed among its pages.

Suffocated and intoxicated, yet gloating in a thousand sentiments.

He is the desert while I’m the lone wanderer,

looking for an oasis within his barren heart.

Like a moth drawn towards fire, knowing its a death trap.

He is the journey that has no end.

The more I explore, the more I find.

Life feels like a treasure hunt, with him by my side.

He is not a dream but a nightmare that freezes my heart cold.

My escape from reality.

My paramour.

The Goodbye Kiss

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picture courtesy- walldevil.com

Waking up to the familiar pain shooting through his neck

and a grumbling stomach put through endless tortures by time travel juice,

ignoring the mind numbing headache

his eyes transfixed to those rolling empty bottles effortlessly trying to seduce.

 

As his lustful lips longed for a sip of the poison

driving him ill at ease,

his parched throat let out a pained groan

begging for his thirst to appease.

 

Crawling his way to the well stashed bar in the living room

he felt like a stubborn and naive kid.

As he dragged himself thoughtlessly towards his doom

he yearned for nothing but from his burning thirst getting rid.

 

Right when he wrapped his fingers round the bottle of ill fame

to quench the thirst that understood no bargain,

he heard the voice of his deceased beau calling out his name

from a far corner of the outstretched garden.

 

Stumbling and falling every few steps on his way outside,

as he ran clumsily towards the voice of his sweetheart,

the distance kept growing with every step forward

and he felt his insides into a thousand pieces being ripped apart.

 

Screaming his heart out as he squandered whatever remaining zeal

he ultimately gave up on existance and the willingness to live.

And as if to quench his thirst and fulfill his dying wish

a drop of dew sitting atop a grass blade brushed upon his lips.

 

Thinking about finally joining his beloved in God’s abode above or under,

seconds before the soul’s departure he was washed over with bliss.

And counting his final breaths he smiled like a baby in deep slumber

letting the fact sink in that the dew drop was life’s ultimate goodbye kiss.