Perhaps Death Can Give Me What Life Could Not!

Soaked in the ceaseless rain

Pouring heartlessly from the endless horizon

Stretching far beyond my eyesight

I stand here watching the tides rise and fall

Allowing the painfully icy breeze to splash on my face

With the hopeless illusion as of washing away my pain.

My soul has been tired of being haunted by

The same livid sentiments

Trying every now and then to suffocate me to death.

All these years it has been crying, wailing, pleading me to let go of it.

But here I stand,

Still feeling your hold on my limbs,

Begging your invisible presence

Refuge to my tortured heart.

I dig my nipped fingers into the temples

Trying to ease the throbbing and pain

And drive away the confusion as of

Whether it is your intense love or immense hatred

That keeps us apart.

As I lift my eyes and stretch my sight

To the far visible divide

Where the still sky meets the stirred sea,

I see your face emerging out of the blues

Radiating an abundance of vitality,

Yet marked with grief.

Unconsciously I’ve started chanting your name

And my frame seems to be dissolving

As I walk through the soothing salty water

Allowing my waist to delicately cut through the waves.

As the night lapsed in peace and harmony

And the dawn breaks,

My moist eyes transfixed at you doubt my heart’s command

For what sorrowful eyes you fixed upon me!

I know you want me to live more

But tell me what life it is

Where my own soul condemns me,

My own conscience asks to dig a grave and bury myself alive

My own thoughts deny

to converse with me anymore

For they know it was the heartless, brutal, inhuman ME

Who sent you to that far off land.

How tranquilizing is the mere feeling of

Getting to listen to you calling out my name

After all these years of killing silence.

As I’m getting closer and closer to your sympathizing face

Floating half in the sea,

Half in the bending belly of the outstretched horizon

I’m recollecting all those brief but precious moments

When even for me life had its gleams of sunshine.

Once again I dream of reliving those moments

Letting your piercing blue eyes slice through me,

Caressing your innocent face,

Slapping you hard for leaving me alone to grieve all these years,

Crying on your shoulders

Allowing all my pain and anguish to flow away with my tears.

Maybe your face is simply an illusion,

Mere trick of the floating clouds

But I no more have the fear of the unknown

For at the bottom of the ocean my frame may stay

But my soul is destined to fly to that far off land where it can find yours.

With the ethereal happiness rushing through my nerves,

My heart is pounding like never before…

Perhaps death can give me what life could not!

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About SK Rajeshwari

I am an incurable bibliophile, dreamer, writer, poet and connoisseur of all things beautiful. This blog 'My Cosmos' is my first love and nothing pleases me more than constructive feedback for my write-ups. My second love is books. I am an insatiable and roly-poly bookworm. Books teach me how to explore the world inside me and the ones that are outcomes of someone else's unadulterated imagination. What beautifies my existence is the endless walk I enjoy putting on those shoes of imagination. Step into my world, feel my poems and allow your wandering soul to be hypnotized by the fragrance of the captivating manifestations of my dreams, experiences and imagination. Allow this feeling to creep into your being and let your nerves speak the language of beauty and artistry. Bienvenido :)

Posted on July 18, 2015, in Poems and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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